It is interesting that the Bible says of the woman – the virtuous woman who is also a wife, that the heart of her husband trusts in her. However, there is no mention of the wife’s heart trusting in her husband. If not her husband, who can her heart trust?
Well, the answer is easy but the reason for the answer is a bit more complicated.
The heart is… the center of the being, the will, brokenness, kindness, emotions, feelings, the place of trust and comfort.
The woman ‘s heart is to trust in Jesus, and even though the man is to put his trust in God if he is to live righteously, his heart trusts in woman.
In the Garden of Eden the Lord made it so…
“Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, ‘This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.’ That is why a man leaves his father and mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh.” Genesis 3:22-24
When man finds a wife he finds the part of him that makes him complete which is why he cleaves to his wife. The woman, on the other hand, taken out from man’s side was created to constantly give herself away as expressed through childbearing. We carry our children but they don’t stay with us. Though it can be an emotional process, we learn that we have to nurture and release.
The heart of woman is to trust in the Lord
When the enemy came in, man who was to be woman’s covering (the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God. 1 Corinthians 11:3) stepped back and allowed her to engage the enemy on her own. The result: they both sinned and fell from their place. Then when God came into the garden to discussion the situation man, instead of taking responsibility blamed the woman. (Read Genesis 3 for the full story)
When God asked the woman what happened she owned up to her part in the situation without blaming her husband for not defending her from the enemy by saying, “the serpent deceived me and I ate,” (Genesis 3:13). Then, even though He handed down punishment, God did not forsake the woman, He had a plan to rescue her. He told the serpent her seed (Christ) would defeat him.
This whole story goes to show that man, when he finds a wife, trusts his heart and well-being to her sometimes to the point that he submits to her opinions and desires above God’s. If her heart is not submitted to God she can lead them both astray.
However, woman is not told to trust her heart to her husband. She can and should love him but her responsibility is to respect and honor him. “Each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband,” Ephesians 5:33. Her heart is to trust in the Lord. If she trusts her heart to husband he will fail her. This is because it was not meant to be entrusted to man but to God.
I am not man bashing and this DOES NOT mean marriage doesn’t work. I am simply answering the question I posed earlier – who should woman trust her heart to? The answer again is Jesus.
The woman, always giving of herself and often getting little to nothing in return, need someone she can trust her heart to completely. This doesn’t mean that a wife cannot trust her husband or be vulnerable with him. What it means is that her husband as much as he loves her can and will at times fail her, while at the same time require her to be one-hundred percent for him so that he can have a safe place. Who, then can she go to when she needs that unconditional vulnerable place? The answer, Beloved, is JESUS.
The problem is that many women have reversed their roles while men have remained the same.
She loves her husband, puts her trust completely in him and he fails her time and again. And she, with all the sorrows of a broken heart wonders why. But if she ever learns to respect him and trust her heart to God, that man will love her like God intended him to. Then the woman, whose heart is trusting in God, will not be disappointed because her heart belongs to the Lord.