This past weekend I was a speaker at a conference in Dallas. If truth be told, I was afraid to go.
Fear is of the devil and it preys upon our smallest thoughts.
Once we let fear in it exaggerates our situations and circumstances. Most of the time the thoughts are unrealistic and so far from the truth that the truth is unrecognizable. It blows things up until they’re bigger than life and our imagination runs wild.
I was afraid to leave my kids behind even though they are old enough to stay home by themselves, (my youngest is 17 and my son who lives at home is 20 years old) and I afraid to fly even though the planes that have been going down are doing so for completely different reasons than the possibilities that I could have experienced.
I was afraid that something could happened to my kids, that they would get in trouble, have some accident or something else would happen to them and I was afraid that my plane would fall out the sky and crash and I would not make it to Dallas or back home to San Diego. I felt unprepared to preach because I’ve been so busy that I hadn’t been spending enough time with God in my opinion and I had only prepared the foundation of my message because I had been procrastinating. I also questioned if it was God’s will, the right timing and so on.
My commitment made me go.
The only thing that kept me going forward was the fact that I had promised my sister months before that I would minister at this conference and I wanted to keep my word to her. Up until the last-minute I kept thinking of ways to tell her that I wasn’t going to be able to make it.
It wasn’t until the night before that I finally looked for something to wear and got packed. Even though I had the foundation of the message prepared in advance I hadn’t studied for my message since. As I walked out the door the next morning at 5 am to catch my plane I prayed a silent prayer, “God, I’m choosing faith over fear and I believe everything is going to be just fine.” When I got on the plane I had peace. I studied the whole while. When I got to my sister’s house I study more and prepared my message.
I went forth with confidence, not in my flesh but in the Holy Spirit.
The next morning woke I up in Holy Spirit mode. I got dressed and got in the position of prayer and hearing God. I felt prepared to bring the message God had given me and went to the conference knowing that God was able to speak through me.
At the conference I was given the honor of leading morning prayer then later I taught a message on the four crowns we will receive for finishing our race. I also prayed with the women at the altar call. After the conference I decided to continue in faith over fear so I turned the fearful thoughts about my kids off and enjoy the rest of my time there with my sister and her husband.
Fear came knocking again but this time I did not answer
When I got on the plane to go home fearful thoughts came again, “This thing to go down and you might not make it.” There were times when there was lots of turbulence that I thought, “I oh my God, is this how my story is going end,” LOL. As it turned out I made it home safely.
Faith won out.
There’s a verse I’ve been mediating on, Psalm 46:5 that says, “God is within her, she will not fall; God will help her at break of day.” Beloved, sometimes when God is taking us to another level or doing something new our fears will challenge us as mine did with a host of excuses as to why we cannot do “it”. But when we decide to choose faith over fear God has good things waiting for us. I did not fall because He didn’t fail me. Everything turned out perfect and I was blessed.